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Archive for the ‘Pregnancy’ Category

EDD +3

Yesterday on our daily lunchtime constitutional, Sarah and I ran into a contingent of strikers from the Writers’ Guild.  They were picketing in Battery Park outside the Museum of the American Indian, neither of which as far as I know employs any members of the Guild, but I’m not an expert on unions or labor law so I’m sure this tactic makes sense somehow.

Anyway, inspired by their efforts, I decided to form my own union and try to obtain better working conditions.  As such, the International Brotherhood of Expectant Fathers, Local 406, (i.e., me) is now officially on strike from being Sweet Pea’s father-to-be.  The way I see it, we’ve been operating without a contract since last Sunday.  We refuse to perform any additional paternal duties until the other side at least comes to the negotiating table and agrees to start uterine contractions.  Binkies down means binkies down!

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EDD +2

Still no baby.  Sarah has an appointment with the obstetrician today, which will hopefully shed a little light on where things are.

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Sarah’s EDD (Nov. 11) has come and gone, and Sweet Pea is still in utero. If anyone knows any non-awful folk methods of inducing labor (yeah, I’m talking about you, castor oil) we’d love to hear them.

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We’re now less than a week from Sarah’s estimated due date.  Since some very large percentage of women deliver in the period from one week before the due date to one week after (and since many other women deliver prematurely), I feel comfortable declaring that, as a purely statistical matter, I’m already the father to a bouncing baby girl.*  Call it Schrödinger’s baby.

*Yes, I feel comfortable grossly abusing half-remembered statistics from the childbirth class we attended.  I’m a lawyer – we’re verbal.  If I were numerate at all I’d be something useful, like an architect or an accountant.

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A ghost-less Halloween

Official count of trick-or-treaters last night:  Zero*.

The bright side:  Enough leftover candy to keep us all on a solid sugar high well past Sweet Pea’s due date.

*For comparison.  Here were the two treat-expecting weirdos that spent last Halloween with the Dwyers:

The happy couple

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Aaron Eckhart.  (Well, Angus sighted.  I was concentrating on keeping my huge 8 1/2 month pregnant self from falling on the slick sidewalk.)

 Calvin Coolidge, the Cat

Matt.  And, yes, the shirt was awesome.  The minutes of the fanclub meeting were missing one crucial event, though.  Matt travels with an entourage just like old Phil Two in the movie.  Want proof?  Here’s the picture:

The Golden Age

Pictured (from left):  Matt, Cardinal I and Cardinal II
Yes, Matt does make the cardinal on the left carry his architecture sketches.  That’s just the way he rolls.

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You know, Sarah and I make a big show of being antiquarian weirdos totally out of touch with the crazy, messed-up times in which we’re living, but the truth is, when push comes to shove, we’re actually weirdos who are largely in sync with these crazy, messed-up times.* Thus, like seemingly everybody else who’s going to have a baby these days, we went in for one of those 3D/4D ultrasound deals. I was initially skeptical, since getting a 4D ultrasound movie set to lullabyes that sound like they were arranged by Enya seems like the sort of thing you do if you’re planning to name your child Makayla or Chance. After having done it, though, I have to say that either my skepticism was ill-founded or I’m some kind of closeted Makayla-namer. It was a delightful experience. I got my first genuinely extended view of Sweet Pea (our previous *medical* ultrasound had felt a little rushed, and they actually spent most of their time looking to see whether the baby was healthy, rather than trying to get some nice head shots … losers …). She spent most of the time cuddled up against the placenta (which, as a guy who likes to spend his time cuddled up against a pillow, I can appreciate). She was also apparently stuck in some kind of yoga position, with one foot up by her head (I have a less easy time understanding the appeal of that). And she smiled a few times. Probably just gas, but it’s a nice reminder that my lame jokes and I are about to have the world’s easiest audience, at least for a little while. Anyway, without further ado, I give you: some cute ultrasonic in-utero baby photos:

It's a Girl!

It’s a Girl!

I think Sweet Pea may be flashing a gang sign in the last one. Lets just hope she doesn’t insist on dressing all in red.

*Except when it comes to naming. Sweet Pea’s real name is not Ava, Emma, Isabella, or Madison. That’s a clue, trying-to-guess-what-Sweet-Pea’s-real-name-is-people.

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